One of the things that happened last week was that a few of the sunflowers started opening their flower faces to the world.
I noticed the first last Friday evening when I was up finding quiet in the cabin. It was peeking at me from the swath down below the garden, a bright splash of perfect color against the dark of the trees, the sunset brilliance of the sky.
By Saturday the first sunflower from the driveway swath was opening.
Isn't it nice when the universe knows when to give you celebratory flowers? The farm and the flowers seemed to know that we're heading into celebration time.
Here's what happened last week that called for flowers:
On Wednesday late afternoon I got a call from Dr. Chui. "This is an
amazing set of scans!" I love how he always gets straight to it! He
was calling with the PET & CT scan results, but he also had the
mammogram and ultrasound results with him as well.
CT scans, or CAT scans, work like big x-ray machines: they show soft tissue, bones, and when you add an iv with "contrast" you can also get information about what is going on with certain organs as the contrast passes through the system. The CT scan shows masses that don't belong, but it won't necessarily tell you exactly what the mass is if you don't already know.
I had just a CT scan midway through chemo, at the end of may, and that was a scan that showed that masses in my lungs and lymph nodes where getting smaller or had disappeared, and that the masses in my liver were the same or slightly smaller, but at least not getting any larger.
The PET part of the scan is really much more interesting. This is
the scan where you drink a glucose/radioactive drink then sit doing
nothing (napping!) in a dark room for an hour before you go in to get
scanned. Here's how I said it in the post of March 21st:
"The idea is that all the cells in
our bodies need sugar (glucose) for energy, but some cells, like cancer cells
who are overachievers and overeaters use a lot more of the glucose--so spiking the glucose with the radioactive
stuff means that then they can scan my body for the radioactivity and see which
locations have been eating the most glucose. In a resting state the cancer is
going to gobble the most."
So this is the same scan I had back in March that showed us the cancer active in lungs and liver as well as chest.
This is the scan that me and Dr. Chui are both so excited to get a look
at now that we're done with chemo. We want to know how metabolically
active the cancer is now. Whatever lights up on the PET part of the
scan is still gobbling sugars, is still hungry cancer.
Ready...Set... Drumroll....
So, when Chui calls on Wednesday to say I have "an amazing set of scans" he means....
NOTHING LIGHTS UP ON THE PET SCAN.
NOTHING. Not a fucking thing. Not a single goddamn** spot lights
up. The CT portion still shows some masses in the liver, and a little
in the lungs. But Chui's pretty certain that what is still there is just the dead mass of the
tumors left behind: scar tissue.
Fuck cancer. Bring on the sunflowers.
Surgery is now planned for August 4th.
Yeah, that's what I said, bring on those sunflowers!
**PS, yes I am sorry for cussing. I have a nasty cussing habit, and it is lazy of me, but just this once, understand that it is used, and intentionally used in print, because you can't see how big the grins are, how pleased as punch I am. Just like the cuss words this disease is mean and revolting and unnecessary. And nyah nyah, I still win! Thank you everybody for your sunflower seeds and support!
That's so awesome! Me and the boys have been praying for you, well for "Luke, Jack, and Emme's Mom" to "not be sick and get better soon." Great news Erin!
Posted by: Sarah Frobisher | July 20, 2009 at 03:23 PM
Are you kidding me?
Holy Moses.
Amazing. Just amazing news, Erin.
Thank you, Universe. Thank you great medical treatment. Thank you good energy.
Thank you, thank you, thank you!
So, what's next, then?
What does this mean for treatment now? Do you continue to have anything surgically attended to?
Do you need to keep doing chemo?
This is astonishing news.
We are walking on air for you all.
Whatever it is you did, KEEP DOING IT.
xoxo Louise
Posted by: Louise (Larsen) | July 20, 2009 at 03:55 PM
Yes, ma'am, FUCK cancer! (And you know I NEVER use that word.)
We arrive on the 4th. Call me or have the BRAS tell me what I can do when I get there.
Posted by: Bobbi | July 20, 2009 at 03:55 PM
What amazing, wonderful, fabulous, better-than-that news! Thank you thank you for sharing! And thank you, thank you Universe!
Posted by: Carol | July 20, 2009 at 05:30 PM
Oh my gosh, Erin, this is amazing, wonderful, incredible news. Strength + Beauty + Love have tilted the universe. Congratulations.
Posted by: Holly Somers | July 20, 2009 at 09:19 PM
Oh, Erin, that is WONDERFUL news!!! I'm so happy for you. And yes, FUCK cancer! My beautiful baby crepe myrtle just started blooming a few days ago; it must have known! Will send you pics through Facebook.
Posted by: Beth Cox | July 21, 2009 at 06:05 AM
You are AMAZING....a true inspiration!!!! Let those flowers know that we are all here with you...way to kick that cancer ass!!!!!
Posted by: Sarah Borders | July 21, 2009 at 02:18 PM
all i have to say is "fuck yeah!!"
Posted by: roman | July 21, 2009 at 04:41 PM
Cuss away because you have earned the right!!! We are so excited to hear your news!!!!! That rocks!
Posted by: Milaka Falk | July 22, 2009 at 06:00 AM
Way to go cousin!! your an inspiration to all! I love to share your site with everyone, because your attitude and beauty is contagious an can be applied to any situation, doesn't matter if it's small or as ugly and difficult as the "C" word.
We love you and will continue to pray and send postitive energy your way!! Much love to you and your family!
Posted by: Tonya Digiorno (Cousin from California) | July 22, 2009 at 08:19 AM
I love sassy Erin, she's so FUCKIN' hot!
Posted by: Tomato | July 28, 2009 at 04:23 PM
Just keep your mantra...Healthy and balanced...
good positive thoughts...kick cancer butt.
Posted by: Kelly - Meikle Place | July 31, 2009 at 05:03 AM
I've lit candles every week, I better go buy the church some new ones. Amazing and miraculous aren't too strong of words, so the F-word seems just about right too.
Posted by: Kristen | August 03, 2009 at 11:20 AM
Yahoo!!!! You go girl! Miracles all around.
Love
Lindsay
Posted by: Lindsay | August 03, 2009 at 05:30 PM
Thinking of you!! Our thoughts and prayers will be with you tomorrow, 8/4!
Love Tonya
Posted by: Tonya Digiorno (Cousin from California) | August 03, 2009 at 06:39 PM
Tuesday Thankfulness: Seeing our beautiful blooming sunflowers in the morning light and thinking of my beautiful cousin & her family in Oregon! Thank you Aunt Sam for being with Erin today!
Posted by: Terra Mudrow | August 04, 2009 at 08:53 AM
I just have to add to the FUCK YEAHS!!
Posted by: Rachel Uris | August 26, 2009 at 02:09 PM
We love you Erin
Posted by: Dana | August 26, 2009 at 08:17 PM
Erin--keep up the good fight. Your recent news is really wonderful and I'm hoping the surgery also went well. Sending good thoughts your way daily. Betsy
Posted by: Betsy Coddington | September 16, 2009 at 08:40 AM